Satsang 18 : B1 autosuggestion method

Until now, under the Personality Defect Removal process, we have learnt about the ‘A-1’, ‘A-2’ and ‘A-3’ autosuggestion methods, we will try to learn about B1 autosuggestion. At times we are affected by the behaviour of others and we even make mistakes. In case we are able to change the behaviour of the person and discipline the person then we can use B1 technique to reduce our tension. In case we are able to alter the behaviour of the person and change the situation we can use this technique. Parents in case of their children, teachers in case of their students, employer in case of employees can use this technique. In case it is possible to change the behaviour of our subordinates then in such situations we can make them realise their mistakes and alter their behaviour by telling them about it frequently, or punishing them. While doing so we should harbour the feeling that their wrong behaviour should change but we should not have any anger or expectations towards them.

Examples of B1 type of autosuggestion

Let us try to understand the technique with the help of few examples.

1. Situation

Nikhil Sane studies in 6th Standard. He always teases his friends and plays roughly. Once while playing, he hit a boy named Ajinkya Kulkarni really hard. Nikhil’s mother Mrs. Sane felt really bad when Ajinkya’s mother complained about this to her.

In this situation it is possible to alter the incorrect behaviour of Nkhil, as Mrs. Sane is his mother. So we have to use B1 auto-suggestion technique. Let us try to understand how to frame the auto-suggestion.

Auto-suggestion

When Ajinkya’s mother will complain to me that Nikhil hit Ajinkya while playing, I will realize that she is telling this to me because Nikhil’s behavior is inappropriate and needs to be corrected. I will think about how to make Nikhil realize his mistake, by explaining or punishing.

Analysis

As a mother it is the duty of Mrs. Sane to mould her son’s behaviour. If she harbours the thought ‘Ajinkya’s mother always complains about my son’, ‘she always finds his defects’. then it will be extroversion. If she thinks that ‘my son does not know to mix and play properly with other children, I should not let him play’; then this defect is ‘extreme thinking’. If somebody is telling faults of our near and dear ones it is utmost important that we listen to it carefully and try to handle it positively.

How this auto suggestion works is that when somebody tells my son’s faults then we should not view the complainer or our son as accused, instead we should try to keep a positive attitude and handle the situation so that the mistake is not repeated.

2. Situation

Even though the exams were near, Mrs. Mehta’s son, Sagar, wasted his time in playing instead of studying. Due to this Mrs. Mehta got irritated and yelled at him.

Auto suggestion

When I will notice Sagar playing the whole day instead of studying for his exams, I will make him aware that if he neglects his studies, he will fail and I will try to inculcate the importance of studies in him.

Analysis

In this case, Sagar’s mother is expected to stay calm and try to handle the situation properly. It would not be appropriate if she gets irritated because of his mistakes. Also, that is not going to change the situation; nor will her sadhana (spiritual practice) take place.

3. Situation

Mr. Iyer is a professor in a college. He yelled at the students for coming late to his class and was angry with them for the whole day. Let us try to frame an auto suggestion for the same.

Autosuggestion

When students will come late to my class, I’ll realize that they need to be disciplined calmly and I’ll make them aware of the consequences of coming late.

Analysis

In this incident, it is important to discipline the students. If we are bothered by the misbehavior of others, then it is important that we make efforts by imprinting the correct perspective on our mind to overcome the situation. Though we are giving an auto suggestion to help others overcome their defects, we have to check if we our anger or irritation is not increasing due to expectation. Most of our internal conflicts are due to not accepting situations. Instead of wasting our energy in finding fault with the situation, we can try to accept the situation and try to find a solution to overcome the given situation.

Though it is correct that students should reach the classroom in time, but if it is not happening in case of a few students, and so Shri. Iyer is getting irritated, then this shows that Shri. Iyer has excess expectations from them and he expects that all students should behave ideally. It is not always possible that all students will behave ideally or they are ideal. Therefore, it is necessary to accept the situation after a certain stage and move forward. By studying what stage we are at, we should give the mind an auto-suggestion of the next stage.

4. Situation

Let us look at the next situation now. – Daughter Mansi, did not fold the bedsheet properly. So I got irritated seeing the improperly folded bedsheet.

Autosuggestion

When Mansi will not fold the bedsheet properly, I’ll make her realize that improperly folded bedsheets look bad and try to get the bedsheet folded properly from her.

Analysis

Initially to discipline the daughter the mother must teach the daughter to fold the bedsheet properly. In the next step it is necessary to give sometime for the daughter to imbibe the quality of folding the bedsheet properly, since it is not possible that if we teach the daughter today, then immediately from the next day she will start folding it properly. So if I am getting reactions in the mean time then I have to give auto suggestions to myself to increase patience. Let us assume that inspite of giving sufficient time to the daughter, she is not folding the bedsheet properly then we can incorporate the following in our auto suggestion – i will explain to her the importance of discipline, or give her a small punishment. If the daughter is still unable to do the needful then we can keep the perspective that ‘all people cannot do everything ideally’ and think of solutions in this line. For example, we need not force the daughter to be ideal or if the daughter has not folded the bedsheet ideally we ourselves can do it. Handling any given situation without frustration, remaining introverted and try to change ourselves and put in the efforts at the spiritual level is  implementing the PDR process.